A Single Taste of Honey
by lisa2302
Summary: BrookeJake - A late night prompts Brooke to correct the biggest mistake she ever made.
1. Prologue

Author's Note: I've never been a huge Brooke/Jake fan, but this idea came into my mind, so I decided to run with it. So, any suggestions or comments that you have will be greatly appreciated.  
  
Summary: AU. Takes place after the cheerleading competition.  
  
**A Single Taste of Honey - Chapter 1**  
  
The clock struck midnight just as Brooke reached the bottom of the stairs. The wood felt beneath her feet, just as her heart felt inside her chest - cold.  
  
She pulled the sleeves of her sweatshirt all the way down and cupped her hands inside as she walked the rest of the way to the kitchen. She had tossed and turned since she had gotten home from the cheerleading competition hours before, but sleep had failed to come to her. A few hours ago, she had been on top of th world and it made her feel happier than she had been in weeks, but that was over. Reality had set in - all of it.  
  
Her parents were gone, as was her best friend and the boy she'd so recently given her heart to. Still, none of those people were the ones troubling her mind and her heart at the moment. These was someone much dearer to her that was on her mind. Everything else - Lucas, Peyton, her parents - were nothing but a temporary distraction from what really kept her awake at the moment. None of them could ever compare.  
  
Brooke pulled a tea pot from the cabinet and filled it with water. She turned on the burner and closed the lid. While the water warmed, she walked to the living room and searched for a video. She ran her perfectly manicured nails across the several shelves that housed hundreds of her favorite movies. Finally, she stopped at the one she had been looking for an pulled it from the shelf. She had just removed it from it's case when the tea pot's whistle rang throughout the house. She inserted the video and walked to the kitchen.  
  
She poured the steaming water into the waiting splatter-painted mug and absently reached for the honey. She squeezed a generous amount into the tea and stirred it lightly with her finger tip. She licked the warm tea from her finger and walked back into the living room.  
  
The movie previews had already ran through by the time she sat down. She turned off the lamp and pulled the blue and white Ravens throw, embroidered with her name, from the wooden chest behind the couch just as the main feature came on the screen. Brooke pulled the soft fabric tightly around her body until she fit perfectly between it and the sofa. She reached for her tea and sipped it slowly as she watched the movie.  
  
Brooke had seen it a hundred times, but she watched it as though it were the first. Finding something in every scene that she had never seen before. An event that made her re-think everything she had done those nine months ago and finally making her realize what it was she needed to change. What is was she needed to be happy and just hoping that she wasn't too late.  
  
As the movie finished, she took the last sip of her tea - the taste of honey overtaking her senses. A sad smile fell across her lips as she stretched out across the sofa. Moments later, sleep finally came and her dreams took her back to where it all began.  
  
Notes: The next few chapters will be Brooke's dream recalling th e events that took place between her and Jake and how they got where they are now. Please read and review! 


	2. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer:_ I don't own Brooke, Jake, One Tree Hill, or anything of that nature.  
  
_Summary:_ A late night prompts Brooke to correct the biggest mistake she ever made.  
  
_Author's Note:_ Thanks so much to everyone who read and/or reviewed. It means a lot to hear your comments and makes me all giddy inside. Everything in italics are thoughts not said. This chapter's a bit longer and hopefully you'll enjoy.  
  
**A Single Taste of Honey  
Chapter 1**  
  
It was a steamy July afternoon when the Tree Hill High van pulled into the parking lot. Twenty very irritated cheerleaders quickly piled out and headed for their cars or their parent's cars as fast as their feet could carry them. Everyone that is, except for Brooke Davis. One of only two freshmen that made the squad.  
  
"You need a ride?" Peyton called back to her friend as she loaded her last bag in the back of her neighbor's Saturn.  
  
"No, my dad's coming." Brooke replied and waved good-bye to Peyton as she left the parking lot. "Or at least he's supposed to be," she mumbled under her breath and pulled her cell phone out of her purse. She dialed the familiar number once again. She had already called three times on the ride home to make sure he was going to be there when she arrived. Each time, he promised and the last time, he told her not to call again. If he could win international lawsuits, then certainly he could remember to pick his fifteen year old daughter up from camp. She spent the next several minutes trying to track him, her mother, or even their house keeper down, but had no luck.  
  
"Having problems, Davis?" A familiar voice called from behind.  
  
"Not now, Jegelski," she huffed.  
  
"So, you hang out in parking lots often?"  
  
"Do you?" She countered as she shoved her cell back in her handbag.  
  
"Fair enough," he replied and continued his walk through the parking lot. Brooke let him walk a few feet, before her curiosity got the better of her and she called after him.  
  
"What are you doing here, anyway?"  
  
"Practicing."  
  
"For what? It's summer." He pointed to the basketball resting between his side and left arm. "Oh...Well, where are you going now?"  
  
"Home."  
  
"How?"  
  
"My feet."  
  
"Oh." Brooke ran her fingers nervously through her hair. She was still stranded. Jake started on his way again, but realized maybe she didn't want to be sitting in the parking lot on a Sunday afternoon.  
  
"Are you waiting on someone?"  
  
"No," she supplied quickly. She didn't want Jake, or anyone else for that matter, to know she had been forgotten. She worked hard, since a very young age to make sure no one really knew what happened in her home life. Even Peyton only knew bits and pieces.  
  
"Brooke?" He questioned when he saw something different flash in her eyes. He couldn't be sure of what, but it looked like shame. Something he never associated with Brooke Davis before. But to be fair, he didn't really know her, at least not anymore. There was a time where they had been close, but school, sports, and boys had changed all that. They talked, but never really paid that much attention to her. He'd heard things, lots of things actually about her and how she'd changed since he knew her as the ten year old who always had candy at recess. But if he'd learned one thing from his parents and their relationship it was that things aren't always as they seem.  
  
Brooke could tell by the look on his face that he wasn't going to give in and a bit relieved that she wouldn't be stranded, gave in. "Fine. My dad's a no show again and I don't have a way home."  
  
"Well, if you're willing to walk the half a black to my house, I'll get my car and give you a lift." He offered. Brooke's face lit up in relief. "Really?" Jake nodded and walked back to her. "You need some help with those?" He questioned, gesturing at the two extremely large suitcases resting on the sidewalk next to her. She nodded. "Thanks so much Jake."  
  
Each grabbed a bag and started the walk to Jake's house. The conversation between them flowed extremely smoothly. Brooke had questioned Jake a bit more about his summer practice and was surprised to find out that Whitey had told him he wasn't short of a starting position next year if he just worked on perfecting some of the basics. Jake asked about camp and congratulated Brooke when she told him the team had won for Most School Spirit, saying he could see why, her dimpled smile gave off a light very few people ever saw, much less had. She couldn't help but smile. No one ever realy listed to her when she talked and they certainly didn't give her compliments without expecting something in return.  
  
As they approached Jake's house, Brooke felt a pang of disappointment run through her. She didn't want to go home. Her prior phone calls already cemented the fact that her gigantic house was empty and to be perfectly honest, it felt nice to have a real conversation with a guy where she was 100 percent positive he wasn't thinking of getting in her pants.  
  
"Earth to Brooke," Jake said snapping his fingers, bringing her out of her daze.  
  
"Uh..Yeah...What?" She asked, shifting her weight. Jake laughed at her confusion. "I said are you ready to go?"  
  
"Oh yeah, I guess," she mumbled.  
  
"Is something wrong?" He questioned, taking the suitcase from her hands and lifting it into the back of the truck. "No, let's go." Brooke walked to the passenger side and got in. A now confused Jake followed.  
  
The ride to Brooke's house was uncomfortably silent. Both teens running through thoughts of their own.  
  
_Why are you acting weird, Davis? You're great around guys, that's what you do, who you are. Why are you so nervous? So worried. About Jake Jegelski, none the less. Sure, he's a hottie and a basketball player, a good one at that, but he's so not the type of guy you usually go for. And why is that, exactly. Oh, that's right, because he's too good for you. He's parents may not be loaded, but he's nice and Brooke Davis does not do nice. And why not?_ She wondered, sneaking a look Jake's direction.  
  
_There is definitely something up with her. She seems nervous, maybe scared. I may not know her well, but I do know her nerves are in good shape, great shape. Hell, she managed to make Dave Sanders cry last year. He was the football captain and she was in eighth grade. Eight grade. Oh Jegelski, what are you thinking. She's just a kid. Well, she doesn't look like a kid and she certainly doesn't act like one. That wasn't the point of this whole little run down, anyway. She's acting weird and not the girl wants boy weird, either. So then what's up?_ He wondered, stealing a quick glance at the brunette cheerleader sitting ever so quietly beside him.  
  
"So, here we are," he said pulling in.  
  
"Here we are," she repeated quietly.  
  
"Are you sure you're okay? You're acting kind of weird."  
  
"Yeah, I'm..." Brooke paused. "Do you want to come in?" She could tell by the look on his face that he thought she was propositioning him. It made her stomach churn. No wonder I don't have a real boyfriend, everyone really does think I'm a slut. "I meant..." His eyes widened. Brooke did have a reputation, there had to be at least some truth behind it. "For lemonade, or tea, or whatever." She started to ramble. "You know what, never mind. Thanks for the ride and I guess, I'll just see you around," she rattled quickly and exited the truck. _Stupid...stupid...stupid. What was that Brooke? Now he's going to think you're a slut and an idiot_. Jake cut his truck's engine and got out. There was definitely something up with her, and it wasn't sex. Something was wrong. "What are you doing?" Brooke asked.  
  
"Helping you with your bags and taking you up on that offer of lemonade, or tea, or whatever."  
  
"You know I wasn't..."  
  
"I know," he replied, lifting her last bag from the back of his truck and starting up the staircase.  
  
Brooke stood there for a few seconds and then jogged to catch up with him. She unlocked the door and let them both in.  
  
"Where do you want these?"  
  
"You can leave them there, I'll go through them later."  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"I'm sure, Jake. And if you ask me that question one more time, you'll regret it."  
  
"Are you..." She threw a glare over her shoulder and Jake silently followed her into the kitchen.  
  
"So, is your house always this quiet?" He asked as he sat down at the bar. Brooke nodded and headed for the refrigerator. "You're parents work a lot?"  
  
"Something like that. What do you want to drink? I've got lemonated, Sprite, tea, water, and kool-aid."  
  
"It doesn't matter."  
  
"You this decisive about everything?" She questioned, pulling the lemonade from the refrigerator.  
  
"Depends."  
  
"On what?" Brooke walked to the cubbard and pulled out two glassed. She had been waiting for him to respond, but he was silent. "On what?" She repeated."  
  
"Lots of things."  
  
"Like?" She sat a glass of lemonade in front of him and settled on the stool facing him.  
  
"The question. My mood. The result of my answer."  
  
"And what you drink isn't of much importance to you?"  
  
"I'd rather let someone else worry about the small stuff. It gives me more time to think about the important things."  
  
"Sounds like a good idea. So what important thing do you have on your mind now?"  
  
"What makes you think that?"  
  
"Well, since I just picked your drink, I'm assuming that's becasue you're busy thinking of something a bit more important than beverage choices."  
  
"You're very observant, Davis. But I'm sure you've heard that a lot." He said, taking a sip of his lemonade. Brooke's face faltered a bit at his statement. She was observant, but even she knew this wasn't something it took a scientist to figure out. But no one ever really commented or for that matter paid enough attention to comment on the things she did and that saddened her. The only person she had was Peyton and with the roller coaster she had been on ever since she hooked up with Nathan Scott, Peyton couldn't tell up from down. It felt good to be noticed without having to take her clothes off.  
  
Jake watched as the expression on Brooke's face changed. There was definitely something up with her. He knew she lived in a nice house and had just about everything under the sun a girl could want, but there was something missing. She smiled a lot, but it never seemed all that real. But before Jake had the chance to question her about the switch in her mood, the smile was plastered back on.  
  
"So, Jake, tell me something about yourself," she said flashing her dimples before she took a sip of the yellow liquid.  
  
"Like?"  
  
"Anything. I don't know you all that well."  
  
"True." He paused a bit, trying to decide just how much to tell. He wasn't the most complicated guy, but he did have his secrets. Secrets that were starting to build up inside, but was Brooke Davis really the right person to tell those secrets to? That he didn't know yet. Best to start out safe. "I hate ketchup." He smiled when he saw her mouth form a smile, a real one now. The kind that made her eyes dance and skin glow. "You should do that more often," he whispered, unsure of himself for saying it and what her reaction would be to it.  
  
"Do what?"  
  
"Smile."  
  
"I smile all the time, Jake."  
  
"You pretend to smile all the time. Just now, you weren't pretending." He finished his lemonade and walked into the other room, leaving a silent Brooke behind.  
  
_How did he know? I never said anything. Is it really that noticeable? Can people tell I'm faking? No one's ever said anything before. Oh god, what if everyone knows it's a facade. They can't. He's just messing with you. But how does he know what buttons to push? What is going on? Only one way to find out._ Brooke took a long swallow, finishing her lemonade, and followed the way Jake had left.  
  
"What was that?" She asked, taking a seat on the staircase next to where he was sitting.  
  
"What was what?"  
  
"What you were saying, about my smile, where did that come from?"  
  
"Scared I'm going to break your cover?"  
  
"What cover? I'm happy, Jake."  
  
"And I'm a superhero." He deadpanned. Brooke sighed heavily and ran her fingers through her silky brown hair at his response. "You remember how you asked me what I was thinking about earlier?" She nodded. "I was trying to figure out what was up with you." He turned his head to look at her. His eyes meeting her's and holding them. He wanted her to know he knew what it was like to put up an act and that he knew that's what she was doing everyday - acting.  
  
"And what did you come up with?" She asked softly.  
  
"That I don't know you well enough to figure anything out." She closed her eyes, disappointed in his answer. For the first time today, she'd thought someone was really paying attention to her, but she fooled herself again. Jake felt his heart stop when he saw her sitting there with her eyes closed. She looked like a lost little girl, not the sensual vixen she came across as, and he wanted to help her. He reached his hand out and gently caressed her cheek, he felt a dampness hit the top of his knuckle and saw tears begin to roll down her face. She opened her eyes and looked up at him, hoping he held the answers to questions she didn't even know to ask yet. "I want to, though," he whispered. He saw the confusion in her eyes and elaborated. "I want to know you well enough, Brooke. I don't want you to have to pretend to smile every day."  
  
"Why not? No one else seems to mind."  
  
"Because I know what it feels like to pretend," he answered honeslty. "You can only do it so long before it all unravels and when it does you won't want to be alone."  
  
"How do you know so much, Jake? What happened?"  
  
"Some other time," he said wiping away the tears she had shed.  
  
"Do you think anyone else can tell?"  
  
He shook his head no. "You put up an award winning act, Miss Davis. I wouldn't have noticed if it hadn't of been for the look on your face in the parking lot."  
  
"What look?"  
  
"Don't worry, know one else will notice. But it will get old and one day, you'll have to distinguish what's real from what's not."  
  
"Will you be there? To help me?" He nodded. "You promise?" She questioned her tone serious and her eyes deadly locked on his. "I promise, Brooke." She nuzzled her face into his chest and he wrapped his arms around her pulling her tiny frame close to his athletic one. "I promise," whispered again. Moments later, she fell asleep. Jake sat there the next two hours just watching her sleep. She looked peaceful and content and he cursed the person who made things so hard for her, whoever they were. She didn't deserve it, there was no way she could deserve it.  
  
---  
  
Please read and review. Thanks!


	3. Chapter 2

**

* * *

Disclaimer:** I don't own anything.  
  
**Summary:** A late night prompts Brooke to correct the biggest mistake she ever made.  
  
**A/N:** Thank you so much for the reviews. I love reading what everyone thinks, so please continue. As for the age, for the purpose of the story, Jake is a grade ahead of Brooke and two years older - making him 16 and about to be a sophomore. More will be explained on that later.  
  
**A Single Taste of Honey  
Chapter 2**  
  
Peyton passed the almost empty whiskey bottle to Brooke, who took a long swig, finishing off the bottle and letting it fall to the floor.  
  
"Isn't Nathan supposed to be here already?" Brooke whined.  
  
"His dad said he had to practice another hour, or he wouldn't let him take the truck."  
  
"It's his truck."  
  
"He doesn't have a license yet, Brooke," Peyton reminded.  
  
"So."  
  
"What about Jake Jegelski?" Peyton questioned shifting the subject from Nathan. "You two have been spending an awful lot of time together the past few weeks." Brooke glared at Peyton.  
  
"I don't want to talk e about it," she spat and hoisted herself up to find another bottle of booze. Peyton followed her best friend into the kitchen.  
  
"Brooke?" Peyton asked softly.  
  
"I said I don't want to talk about it, Peyton."  
  
"I know."  
  
"Then what?" She asked irritated.  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm fine, Peyt," she said grabbing the other bottle of whiskey from the cubbard.  
  
"Are you sure?" Just as Peyton finished her question, a loud horn soundeed, signaling Nathan's arrival.  
  
"I am now. Let's go friend." Brooke linked her arm in Peyton's, plastered a smile on her face, and the two of them left Peyton's house.  
  
"It's about time, Scott," Brooke said crawling into the back seat. Nathan knew by her tone, she wasn't being sarcastic and that only made it worse.  
  
"I see you two started the party without me...again."  
  
"I don't like to wait."  
  
"And everyone knows it," Nathan mumbled, just loud enough to be heard.  
  
"Nathan," Peyton scolded, speaking up for the first time.  
  
"I'm just speaking the truth," he replied and backed out of the driveway.  
  
"Well, you don't have to be such a ..."  
  
"Peyton, it's not a big deal," Brooke interrupted. "It's not his fault he's an ass. Look at his dad, the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree."  
  
Nathan slammed on the brakes. "Do you wanna walk?" He yelled turning around to face her.  
  
"Why can't you two just get alone...or at least be civil. Is that too much to ask?" She looked at them both pleadingly. For the life of her, she could not understand why the two of them hated each other so much. She was always having to play referee and it was getting old.  
  
"Fine," Nathan mumbled and continued the drive to Seth's party.  
  
As soon as Nathan pulled up to the house, Brooke was fighting her way out of the back seat.  
  
"Where are you going?" Peyton questioned.  
  
"Away from him. I'll see you inside."  
  
"Just be careful, Brooke."  
  
"I always am." She flashed her friend a smile and went to find the real party.  
  
Peyton felt Nathan's arm lock around her waist. "Why do you have to be so mean to her?" She asked in a voice barely above a whisper.  
  
"She started it."  
  
"I don't care," Peyton replied, turning in his arms to face him. "You don't have to insult her."  
  
"She insulted me," he countered. Peyton glared. "I know, I know. That doesn't mean I have to do the same. But in my defense, she was extra bitchy tonight."  
  
"I know and I think it has to do with Jake."  
  
"Jegelski?" Nathan asked confused. He knew Jake from basketball, but he'd never seen him anywhere around Brooke. To be perfectly honest, she didn't seem like his type, at least not anymore.  
  
"They've been spending a lot of time together and then tonight she was different."  
  
"Well, if anyone can take care of themself, it's Brooke."  
  
"She has feelings, Nathan."  
  
"I didn't mean it like that," he protested.  
  
Peyton sighed. "I know."  
  
"Can we forget about Brooke now?" Nathan pulled his girlfriend closer to him and she nodded, reaching up to him and placing a teasing kiss on his lips.  
  
"I think it's time to find the keg." She grabbed his hand and together they made their way inside.

* * *

Brooke walked through the house and found the keg. "Fill me up," she instructed, holding out the red plastic cup she had picked up from the counter on the way over.  
  
"And Brooke Davis has arrived," Tim commented while filling her cup.  
  
"Shut up, Keg Boy," Brooke responded, taking a long drink immediately after.  
  
"You know my name, Brookie."  
  
"Don't call me that. And I may know your name, but more importantly, I know that the only reason you're invited to these things is to fill everyone else's cup."  
  
"And you're invited because you're an easy piece of ass," he responded automatically. "We all play our parts Brooke."  
  
"Fuck you!"  
  
"That's what I'm hoping for." He responded with a wink. I disgusted Brooke turned away.

* * *

The party rattled on and Brooke didn't fail to be the center of it. Guys keps handing her shots and she kept taking them. She knew what happened when she drank, but she also knew why  
she drank. Sex was the lesser of two evils.

* * *

She felt a strong, warm hand on her shoulder and prepared her smile before turning to greet the owner of the hand, but when he did, her face quickly fell.  
  
"What are you doing here?" She spat and pushed him away quickly.  
  
"Looking for you."  
  
"Well, you found me. Good-bye." She tried to move away, but he grabbed her arms as she passed. "Jake, let go."  
  
"We need to talk."  
  
"I think I heard all I needed to hear from you this afternoon."  
  
"Which is exactly why we have to talk."  
  
"And why it shouldn't be any suprise to you that I don't. Why don't you just let me get back to my," she paused, "what was it you called it again?"  
  
"Brooke," Jake whispered calmly.  
  
"That's right," she said snapping her fingers as another fake smile flashed across her face, "a two bit whore routine." Her face quickly turned to stone and she removed herself from his grip.  
  
Jake watched as she made her way through the crowd. He still couldn't believe he said it in the first place and hearing his words coming out of her mouth struck him hard.

* * *

A few minutes passed before he was faced with a very angry Peyton.  
  
"What in the hell did you do to her?" She demanded.  
  
"Hello, Peyton."  
  
"Don't try and play nice with me, Jake. Whatever you did, you better undo it. She has enough to deal with, without your crap."  
  
"That's what I'm trying to do, but she won't let me."  
  
"Figure something out," she ordered and took off in the same direction Brooke had a just moments earlier.

* * *

It took Peyton several minutes to locate her friend. Brooke was excellent at avoiding people when she really wanted to. But, finally, Peyton found her upstairs in one of the bedroom closets. She was hugging her knees to her chest and sobbing quietly. Peyton approached and sat down silently. She ran her fingers through her best friends hair and Brooke automatically fell into her lap. Soon, her crying became more violent.  
  
Brooke rarely cried, but when she did it was like opening a flood gate. Everything that had been pent up and stored so fantistically came flowing out. There was always a trigger, in this case Jake, but it was never the only thing she was letting out.  
  
Peyton held her friend as she cried, letting her know that she was there. No matter how much she was hurting, Peyton wanted her to know that she wasn't alone. She loved her, even if no one else did.  
  
Eventually, Brooke's crying ceased and she settled herself so that she was able to look at Peyton. Peyton wiped her tears away gently. "Do you want to talk about it now?" She questioned gently.  
  
Brooke remained silent for a few more moments. "Do you think I'm a whore?" She asked, her voice came out raspy and scared.  
  
"Did Jake call you that?" Peyton asked, her voice rising. She tried to control her anger, but it wasn't working very well. She was sick and tired of hearing that word associated with her friend. Brooke was a lot of things, but a whore was not one of them.  
  
"Something along those lines." Brooke waited for Peyton's response, but her friend was silent. "So?" She asked again.  
  
"You and I both know that's not true." Peyton stated firmly.  
  
"Then why does everyone say it?"  
  
"Because you let them," She answered honestly.  
  
"He won't believe me if I tell him." Brooke whispered her voice cracking as she tried to contain her emotions.  
  
"Then he's not worth it."  
  
"I think he might be."  
  
"He did come here tonight."  
  
"He did." The girls fell silent for several minutes. Brooke contemplated what to do. Was he worth it? Was she worthy? Would he even take her seriously? She didn't know, but she thought he might. For the first time, she really thought it was about more than sex. "I should probably find him." Peyton nodded as they walked out of the room. "Thanks, Peyt." The two girls hugged and Brooke went to see if Jake was still there.

* * *

Brooke was surprised to find him sitting at the bottom of the stairs. "Jake." He turned and immediately noticed her puffy eyes and red face. She'd been crying. It was his fault. Both were two more things that made him hate himself more. He'd never meant to hurt her, the words, they'd just come out. What he really wanted to do was hold her in his arms, tell her he was sorry, and that everything would be okay now. But he couldn't. That was too easy. And if he wanted to make this right, and he did, because as much as he had tried not to, he cared about her, he couldn't go the easy way. He had to do it the right way. "Can we talk?" She asked, taking a seat next to him.  
  
"Yeah, but not here. Do you...Can we go somewhere else?"  
  
She nodded. "Just let me tell Peyton."  
  
"Okay. I'll wait here."  
  
Brooke found Peyton rather quickly and after promising to be careful and to be honest with him, Peyton hugged her and told her she'd call tomorrow.  
  
"Ready?"  
  
Jake took her hand and they left the party. The drive to her house was extremely quiet. Brooke was nervous. Her buzz had worn off and being honest wasn't something she was all that great at. She'd spend her whole life playing a game, being a character, and hiding behind a mask. She wasn't sure she could take it off, even for Jake.  
  
Jake was scared. He'd messed up and it wasn't as though messing up was new to him. He'd done more than his share, but not lately. He'd thought he was passed all of that. Passed the anger, the jealousy, the petty words of other people, but those were all unleashed this afternoon and on Brooke. It wasn't fair for her to suffer, because he couldn't control himself.  
  
When Jake pulled into the driveway, neither of them got out.  
  
"I'm sorry," Jake began. "I shouldn't have said those things."  
  
"Then why did you? I thought everything was okay. Then, this afternoon, you came by and you were so angry, Jake."  
  
"I know."  
  
"Did something happen?" She wanted to understand. She wanted answers. He'd just changed so quickly and it didn't make sense to her.  
  
"Not really." He had no idea how difficult it was going to be to tell her. To look her in her eyes, those gorgeous hazel eyes, and tell her that everyone thought she was a slut. That they talked about her and it wasn't nice. It wasn't even mean. It was cruel and dirty.  
  
"Jake," she said quietly, "you can tell me. Whatever it is." He turned to face her. She was so open right now. Waiting for him. Trusting him. If she was anyone else, he'd think she was naive enough to believe whatever he told her. That he wouldn't have to tell her the truth, but she wasn't anyone else. She wasn't your normal girl.  
  
"I was at the court with some of the guys and..."  
  
"Oh." She knew where this was going. He didn't need to continue. "I know what they say. I thought you did too."  
  
"I did. But today, it bothered me and I snapped. Brooke, I'm not the guy you think I am. At least not all the time. I'm not always so calm and wise like you keep tell me. I have my faults."  
  
"And I'm not a slut, Jake."  
  
"I know."  
  
"No. I really mean it. I don't sleep around. At least not like everyone thinks. I'm not pure or anything, but I haven't slept with half the football team or whatever it is you heard, because I know it's all out there."  
  
"Then why does..."  
  
"Everyone say so? Because I let them. I can live with people thinking those things about me, I can play the part that they want me to. But I rarely follow through. I've slept with two guys, not twenty. I get so far and then..." She faltered slightly, realizing that there was no turning back. Once she told him, that was it.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I just can't do it. I thought I could, but after the second time, I couldn't look at myself in the mirror. I was thirteen and I couldn't look at myself. Do you know what that's like?" She didn't give him time to respond. "And when I don't follow through, they always get mad and say they'll tell everyone we did anyway, so why not? They throw their fit, realize it's not going to happen, leave, and then next day, there's a new rumor. That's what they are, Jake. Just rumors. I know you probably don't believe it and I understand, but that's the truth."  
  
Jake sat silently, taking in everything she had just said. Watching her closely as she watched him. Remembering the look in her eyes as she had spoken to him, the sound of her voice. It wasn't as smooth and confident as it normally was. She wasn't smiling, either. She was being honest.  
  
"You know why I flipped out today? Because for the first time I really cared. You weren't just some random girl they were talking about. You're someone I see as so much more than the piece of meat they make you out to be. I just couldn't take it. I don't want you to be portrayed as this easy, whore, when that's not how I see you at all."  
  
"It's not?"  
  
"No and I do believe you."  
  
"I didn't think you would." She whispered.  
  
"Then why did you tell me?"  
  
"Because for the first time I really cared. I didn't want to see you walk away like all the rest."  
  
"I'm not going to walk away."  
  
"Is that a promise?"  
  
Jake lifted his hand and ran it slowly, gently down her cheek. She closed her eyes, memorizing the feeling his touch sent through her. It was a feeling she only felt when he touched her, no one else. She'd never felt it before, but prayed that she would always feel it when their skin met. "One I'll keep forever." She opened her eyes and stared into his. They were so warm, so caring. He leaned in and brushed his lips gently against her's. It was the first time he'd kissed her and it was perfect. Just like she saw him to be.

* * *

_  
Next in A Single Taste of Honey...Brooke will discover just what happened that made Jake so smart for his age and why he can understand her and help her more than she ever thought._  
  
Read & Review, please! 


	4. Chapter 3

_I apologize for the lack of updates. Writing isn't something that happens overnight, at least not for me. I want to try and give the best I possibly can to my writing and a result of that is some long spans between updates. You should all thank Janine for helping get the juices flowing and Bryan for reviving his role as the lovely Jake Jegelski again. Enjoy and please read and review!_

**A Single Taste of Honey  
Chapter 3**

The remaining months of summer passed quickly and before she knew it they were back in school. She'd spent most of her days with Peyton and her afternoons and nights with Jake. Both relationships were in full blossom. Not to mention that she and Nathan had actually been getting along. For the first time in awhile, Brooke was genuinely happy. Her life was far from perfect. In fact, her parents were around less and the rumors about her sexual escapades were just as abundant as they ever were, but it didn't matter because she wasn't alone anymore. She didn't fall asleep every night believing no one would ever understand her or her actions because someone already did. Jake did.

How he did, she wasn't quite sure, and up until now, she had been too busy basking in the happiness he brought her to wonder that much about it. But Jake was acting weird these days and he had been ever since the started classes again. He wasn't as free as he had been during the summer. He was tense all the time and she knew that something was bothering him. Now, she just needed to figure out what it was. Jake had done so much for her the last two months that she wanted to be there for him in the same way. She wanted him to lean on her and trust her the way she did him. She wanted him to let her in.

When she saw him across the parking lot at the end of the school day, she walked over with only one intention - to get him to talk to her.

"Hey Jake," she said making her way to his car in the almost vacant parking lot. He turned and smiled as she approached.

"Hey yourself." She placed a chaste kiss on his lips before sliding into the driver's seat of his car. "And what do you think you're doing little lady?"

"I want to take you somewhere."

"Well, that's going to be difficult seeing as you don't have a license."

"I won't tell," she replied with a sly smile.

"I'm sure you won't, but no." On cue, a perfect pout found its way to her face. "Don't do that."

"Come on, Jake. Please." He sighed.

"Brooke, that's not fair."

"Then let me drive."

"I can't."

"Why not?" He opened his mouth to explain, but quickly closed it again, causing an uncomfortable silence to emerge between them. "Why not?" She asked again.

"I just can't. I promise, I'll take you wherever you want to go." Brooke didn't budge. "Brooke, please."

"I don't want to go anywhere."

"Okay. Then, I'll just take you home."

"I don't want to go home, Jake."

"Well, I do, so let me in." He was growing impatient with her stubborn persistence.

"No."

"Brooke."

"Neither of us is going anywhere until you tell me what's going on."

"Nothing's going on, Brooke. It's a pretty simple concept, actually. You're fifteen and you don't have a permit, so you can't drive."

"This isn't about driving, Jake."

"Then what is this about, Brooke?" He questioned, stressing her name at the end to show his growing annoyance.

"This is about why you just shut down on me. This is about why you've been acting so weird the last three weeks. Something is going on with you and I want to know what it is."

"It's nothing."

"That's not an answer, Jake. Something is bothering you and I want to help, but I can't if you don't trust me."

"I do trust you, but this has nothing to do with you. This is about me."

"That's not true."

"It is."

"Maybe it used to be, but not anymore. If something upsets you, then its going to upset me too. You have to know that." Brooke stood and pulled him into her embrace. "I want you to look at me, Jake and I want you to know that you can tell me anything. Whatever you're scared of, whatever it is that you think I can't handle, I can. And more than that, you have to know that I'm not going anywhere." Jake sighed.

"I know."

"Then let me in." He nodded and she smiled his favorite smile.

"Not here, though."

Jake pulled into the empty Davis' driveway ten minutes later. Brooke took his hand and they walked inside and up the stairs to her bedroom. They laid in silence on her bed, she tucked safely in his arms until he was ready.

"Do you remember when you told me you were thirteen and couldn't look at yourself in the mirror?" Brooke nodded. "And you stopped sleeping with all those guys because it made you feel bad about yourself?"

"Yeah."

"Well it wasn't like that for me. I didn't have a revelation, at least not by my own free will." He paused and Brooke waited patiently. "When I started high school, I made new friends. Steve and Travis moved away when their parents got divorced and since we'd been attached at the hip since we were born, I never had any need to find other friends. I had to start over when the left. I didn't want to be an outcast.

When I met Aaron, he was so willing to bring me into his life and introduce me to all of his friends and that was really all I wanted. At first, it was great. There were games and parties and girls and all the other stuff a freshman guy dreams about. Aaron made all of that real for me. But one day it changed. A couple of us were at Aaron's house when his brother, Austin, came home from college. He'd taken a semester off or at least that's what he told everyone. He was a riot and in a way we all sort of idolized him, so the night he asked us if we wanted to hang out with him and some of his buddies, we didn't have to think twice about saying yes.

He took us to a party and when he asked if we wanted to try the 'good stuff' we didn't even consider saying no. It wasn't the first time I'd seen coke, but it was the first time I tried it. After that night, there were more parties and more opportunities. The drugs were always there and it got to the point where I wanted them. I craved them.

It got really bad after I found my dad and my aunt going at it in our kitchen. I was supposed to be at school. He was supposed to be at work. Needless to say we were both in the wrong place that day. He promised me it was a one time thing and that the best thing I could do for my mom was to keep it between the three of us. I agreed.

After that I spent less time at home and more time loaded. I didn't want to think about any of it. I thought I was okay. I would look in the mirror and convince myself that my eyes weren't dilated and my clothes were getting to big for my fragile frame. I told my parents I had eaten before I'd gotten home and convinced myself that it was true.

Anyone that knew me could see that something was wrong. A few of my teammates tried to talk to me, but my response was a simple 'fuck off' and soon after I quit the team. I couldn't see that there was anything wrong with what I was doing. I couldn't see that I was killing myself, not until the night I almost did."

Brooke lay deathly still in his arms, even as his grip on her tightened with the recollection of the events in his past. It couldn't be easy for him, she knew how difficult it was to tell him her secrets and it didn't seem to be anything to what he was confessing now. She did want to help him and at this moment, that meant listening to him.

"One day we decided that we had masters the art of cocaine use, so we went for something stronger. I guess it was too strong or maybe just too much because the only thing I remember past the needle full of heroin being stuck in my arm is the annoying drip of the IV sitting next to my hospital bed."

"You overdosed?" Brooke knew the answer before she turned to him, but that didn't erase the look of shock and fear on her face. Jake simply nodded to her question. "How did I not know?"

"Few people did. I told you there was something to be said for keeping a low profile." He joked, but she didn't laugh.

"You almost died, Jake. That's not funny."

"I know, but it taught me something."

"I sure as hell hope so."

"Brooke calm down, it was a long time ago."

"It wasn't that long ago. You're only a sophomore."

"It was two years ago."

"I can't believe you didn't tell me."

"Its not exactly something I go around advertising."

"You could have died, Jake."

"I think we established that."

"Don't get smart with me."

"Well, don't get all self-righteous on me."

"Is that what you think I'm doing?" She yelled, obviously insulted.

"That is what you're doing!"

"You almost died," she repeated.

"Brooke."

"You almost died, Jake. Do you know what that means?"

"Yes and much better than you do. Why are you freaking out about this? This happened a long time ago. Long before you and I ever started acknowledging each other again."

"That's exactly my point, Jake. You were this close to dying." She used her fingers to show how close he had escaped death. "Which means I was this close to not running into you that day in the parking lot. Which also means, I was this close to never being as happy as I have been these past few months. I almost missed you, Jake and I'm sorry if you think I'm overreacting or if you think its not my place to say anything, but I can't help it. I love you and the thought of none of this between us ever happening scares me. Just the thought of not having you around kills me." Jake watched her closely and a smile slowly settled across his face. "What is that look for?"

"You." She sat in front of him, still fuming, but he reached for her and his touch made her heart jump. Jake pulled her into his lap facing him. "You don't have to worry about any of that now. I'm okay."

"Then why are you acting so weird?"

"Because that night, there was an incident."

"What kind of incident?"

"The other guys robbed a store. I was passed out in the car. They brought me in after. They got sent to juvy. I got three months in rehab, which is why I'm a grade behind. They got out two weeks ago and now I guess I'm just waiting."

"For what?"

"For them to come back. Their parents moved later that year, but I don't know what to expect."

"Then maybe you shouldn't expect anything."

"What do you mean?"

"Maybe they've grown and learned just as much as you have since then. Maybe they aren't going to come looking for you because all they want to do is forget and start over the way you have. I really don't think you should worry about them. But if they do resurface, it'll be different this time."

"How's that?"

"Because this time you have me."

"I do, don't I?"

"Absolutely."

"You want to know something else?" He asked pushing the hair on her left side behind her ear.

"What?"

"I love you, too."

"You caught that, huh?"

"Yeah, I caught that."

Brooke blushed and smiled one of her genuine smiles giving Jake no other choice but to capture her mouth with his.


End file.
